Cooking is an art, Baking is a science. I’m into art.

I literally had to sort of pull the recipe for this next one out of my ass, because I’ve made it differently every time -insert laughing crying emoji here-

If you guys couldn’t tell, my husband gets kinda tired of soups from time to time. Last year, I invented this one, and after 3 times in 2 months he was like OKAY PLEASE SOMETHING I NEED A FORK TO EAT.

I get a little carried away with the soups, but it’s fall, dammit, I want soup in the hopes that it might promote a little cold weather here in OK. It hasn’t worked so far, but I’m hopeful.*

*Update! We actually got our first real fall morning, with fog and me going down to pre-heat my car in my pajamas and boots and everything. If I weren’t already planning to make spaghetti, I would most definitely be making this soup tonight.

look at all those glorious veggies

Now, when I tell you guys that I pulled a recipe out of my ass, I’m not really being self-deprecating: I probably had to scrounge around in my kitchen and figure out what was going to go bad if I didn’t use it ASAP. Carrots are a frequent victim of this, because I usually buy baby carrots, and they tend to go bad in the bag. I’m seriously the world’s worst to accidentally let vegetables go bad. I haven’t had a cucumber in like 2 years because I buy them and forget them, and then they’re liquid.

But, since my discovery of this recipe, I’ve made it enough times to baaasically remember how it goes. And now I’ve written it down, just for you all. But just remember, guys, you can sub in or out anything you don’t like. Recipes are very flexible.

Muy Caliente Chipotle Pork Soup
I don’t have a clever name for this one, alright?


  • A little over a pound of pre-seasoned pork loin. They got this shit at Walmart, go find it.
  • 2-3 big carrots, large-diced.
  • 1 large onion, diced
  • 2-3 celery stalks, large diced
  • 2 cloves of garlic, minced
  • A couple of red or orange bell peppers if u want ‘em
  • Salt-n-pepa
  • Idk a sprinkle of cumin? Maybe 1 teaspoon?
  • 2 or 3 of them chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, chopped as fine as you can get ‘em.
  • 2 cans Rotel tomatoes.
  • Like….Idk, half a cup of that really good green salsa from the Hispanic section of ya grocery store
  • Probably 2 of the 32oz cartons of chickin broth
  • Juice of 2 limes + more for garnish


  • Cooked white rice
  • Some crispy tortilla strips


  1. FIRST THINGS FIRST MOFOS: Either grill or sear ur pork loin. I make my husband grill it and it’s all smoky and delicious. But if you sear it, legit just pour some oil in ur skillet, heat it up real high, throw in ur pork loin. Wait till it gets brown on that one side (it will be easy to pull up) and rotate it so each side gets equally seared.
  2. Toss that bad boy up in ur crockpot, on low, for like….Idk, 4-5 hours? Tbh I just sort of fucked around with ingredients and it ended up tasting AMAZING so I don’t remember the exact steps.
  3. Unlike most of my recipes, probably don’t drink wine the whole time u wait.
  4. When ur pork loin is fork-tender, shred it all up into small pieces. Shred it aaaallll up.
  5. Now get ur veggies all diced up, and toss them in a big pot with a lil bit of that chickin broth to simmer. Simmer till they’s tender.
  6. Throw in ya seasonings, pork loin, rotel tomatoes, chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, green salsa, and chickin broth. OMG and the limes I almost forgot. Just the juice.
  7. I really don’t know what else to tell you  other than bring to a boil and then simmer for about 30-40 minutes. U can cook ur rice according to the directions on the package from there.
  8. Serve over rice, with some tortilla strips on top and tequila on the side. And one more lime wedge if ur like me and like a lot of lime.

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